Smile & Pass it on!

Smiles are absolutely contagious. So is yawning, interestingly enough. Have you ever noticed how one exuberant person can absolutely light up a room? (ie, that famous scene from When Harry Met Sally) The same is true with a tired negative attitude - it is equally contagious. So what can you do to make sure that your attitude is worth catching? Here is an easy way to start: make 5 people smile every day. Here's the catch - they must be strangers! That's right, make them smile without requiring anything in return. Compliment the cashier on her earrings. Pet a stranger's dog (with their permission of course) and thank them for allowing you to visit. Pick a wildflower and give it to the person that brings you your latte. Hold the door open for the next person coming through the door. Pick up a lucky penny and hand it off to someone else.

Making someone else smile will make you smile even more. Go out and infect someone with happiness today!

Ahh time to reboot

It has been ages since I've allowed myself the time to sit and ruminate on life. Especially in front of my keyboard. I don't like New Year's resolutions, but as I type it occurs to me that I really need to keep a promise to myself to do this more often.

I'm sure that you have had the same thing happen to you. You tell yourself "tomorrow I'll have time for me", and you allow the little everyday things to get in the way. Then before you know it. months have gone by and you realize you feel drained and disconnected. Why? Because despite the fact that you were still "taking care of everything" you neglected to take care of you.

For example. I have been telling myself for over four months now that I need a haircut. Fortunately, as a woman I can easily get away with that! Unfortunately, my hair is starting to look pretty rough. (split ends on my split ends) I finally took some scissors to a few places that looked the worst, but really it's no substitute for a good haircut. Why have I neglected this simple thing for so long? Well at first it was a budget issue. Then it was a time issue. Then it was the holidays. Then it was a budget issue, again...

I painted my daughter's room pink today. She loves it (such a girly girl). I love to paint, artistically or just plain painting the walls. I just get very calm and centered when I do it. I love to get paint in my hair and on my hands. Funny thing is, until I was painting today I had buried that love. It dawned on me while I was cutting in the bottom of a wall how much I really enjoy painting.

So this is your wake up call, and mine. Remember that simple thing that makes you feel good and for crying out loud, don't wait six months before you "indulge". Also, don't forget that it might be something as simple as a bubble bath or reading a great book that helps you feel refreshed (or a combination of the two). Indulgence isn't always expensive!

The Best of Times, The Worst of Times

To borrow a phrase from Charles Dickens, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..." How often this is true still amazes me. This is the challenge that life brings us on a daily basis. It is the challenge to find the good in the bad. If we can remember that every "challenge" every "problem" has wrapped within it some pearl of wisdom, some ray of light we can make it through those trying times with our sanity and even happiness in tact.
I have had a very challenging week. I have also had amazing opportunities arise from those challenges. We can't ever really know just how fortunate a situation we are experiencing until we look back on it. I'm sure you've had the experience of thinking back to something that might have seemed like it was bad or inconvenient or even a full blown "crises" at the time that turned out to be exactly what you really needed to move forward.
So here is my "pearl of wisdom" for you: always remember that there is a way through what you are dealing with. Your answers or solutions might not always be crystal clear to you immediately, but they always exist - you just have to allow yourself to run into them. Repeat to yourself, "I am going through this right now, and through this I will go!" In other words, yes you are having a particular challenge but this too shall pass!

Baby Steps - Step 5 Higher ground

Okay now that you are smiling at everyone (you are right?), now it's time to understand how that effects your partner. You may not realize it, but you can become a buoy for your partner and vice versa. There is a reason why "for better or worse" is in the traditional wedding vows. This is true even if you are not married though. It can be true in a business partnership, a friendship or even parenthood.

Sometimes your partner will suffer through a bad day. Even people that are happy 99 percent of the time still have their moments! Yesterday was my birthday. I had cleared my afternoon so that I could have some great "me" time. Unfortunately, I had a situation arise that interfered with these plans. I felt myself slip into a grumpy mood for a moment as I contemplated cancelling all my plans and just dealing with the interruption. Then my sweetheart grabbed me by the hand and said "I've got your back. Don't let this spoil your fun. Let's find a way to work around it." Do you know in that brief statement he managed to put things instantly into perspective for me?

Of course he was right. We worked out a solution together, my plans had to change a bit, but I still ended up finding a way to enjoy the day surrounded by love and laughter. He offered me a boost up and I accepted. This is so powerful. Try it the next time you are dealing with a "crises". Remember that in retrospect those "crises" moments will only look like a tiny blip. Most of all you need to realize that if you are on the higher ground emotionally you need to offer your hand, and if you aren't you need to accept the hand that is given.

Baby Steps - Step 4 Reaching Out

On my average day I speak with between 100 and 300 people. Whew! That can be tiring. It can also be very exhilarating because you really never know who you'll meet. You may meet the exact right person that has a piece of whatever puzzle you're currently trying to solve.

So how do you, when you are rushed, stressed or distracted still manage to reach out and connect with someone? You're going to laugh when you hear how simple it is! Smile. Smiles are wonderful tools and they are absolutely contagious. The very best part about a smile is that it costs you absolutely nothing to give away and it pays you back in tremendous dividends.

So tomorrow morning when you start your day the very first thing you can do to get started on a successful day is smile. Start with the mirror (because you deserve a smile too) and then move on to your partner, your kids, your co-workers, your customers.... and the list goes on. Smile at EVERYONE and then try to have a bad day - guess what? You'll find that you won't be able to have a bad day after that.

Baby Step 3 - Thank you!

How many times have you heard your friends, or yourself, complaining about how your partner or family takes them for granted? I know you've thought it at some point. Remember how that made you feel? Yuck, right?
So here is the next step for you and it is really simple: say thank you. Yep, easy right? But so often we forget to express that. We remember to thank the cashier in the grocery store or the kid serving us fries at McDonalds, but we forget to thank the people we hold most dear.
So here is your assignment (should you choose to accept it...). Go to that person today - right now - and tell them "thank you". They'll probably ask you "what for?". They may even suspect that you're up to something if they haven't heard this from you in a while!
Your answer to this question is simple too. The answer is "Thank you for being you. Thank you for your love and support. Thank you for sharing my day, my life. Just thank you!"
You're going to have a wonderful sensation of joy, love and peace when you express this. You'll see!

Baby Steps - Step 2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_mBLWpdwnI I posted this link because it made me laugh. I think laughter is so key to happiness. I realize we tend to laugh when we are happy anyway, but it is like fuel for the fire - the more we laugh, the better we feel.

Have you ever noticed how you feel after a great belly laugh? You are relaxed, you are smiling and you may have even released some tears. It's a wonderful feeling.
There is a great scene in Mary Poppins (yes my daughter forces me to watch it over and over again!) where they go for a tea party on the ceiling. The song they sing is called "I Love to Laugh". As the characters laugh they raise higher and higher in the air. The same theme is repeated in Peter Pan - to fly you must think happy thoughts!

So here is the next step: find a way to laugh with your loved ones and/or partner. It is a great bonding experience and a wonderful way to exorcise stress. Even if you have to resort to tickling each other!

I can't begin to tell you how much it delights me to hear my sweetheart laugh. Especially when he's doubled over holding his stomach! It is absolutely contagious. You just can't watch someone laugh like that and not join in.

Try it today - laugh in love and love to laugh!